For Kipp

In the game of pool, a lot is determined by the break you've been given.  Some of us have better breaks than others but we all have to play what the table gives us.  It is up to each one of us to decide what angles to look for, what strategy we will use, and what shots we ultimately take.  Even with the best angles, strategy, and shots, sometimes the balls just don't drop the way you think they should.

Anthony Kipp Fix (Tony) was born January 5th 1973.  He was a good friend, cousin, nephew, and  son.  He was always a real shark of a pool player.  He was my favorite cousin growing up.  From playing with Star Wars toys to riding our big wheels, my cousin Kipp could do no wrong.  When I graduated high school he took me on a trip to Kings Dominion that to this day I can still feel in my bones.  I faced  a ton of fears that day and rose to all the challenges with him by my side.  It's still one of the most selfless things anyone has ever done for me.

Just like the breaks at the beginning of a game, when life smashed into us, the older we got, the further we drifted apart.  He was always someone of solitude and I became busy building a life of my own.  For both of us, the eight ball dropped too soon on a lot of our family.  Our cousin at 18, our grandmother, his mother (my aunt), and our uncle all seemed to exit the game of life too soon.  Just when the game was getting good, just when we thought we had figured out all the angles.

My mom (his aunt), my step-dad (his uncle), and myself became his relatives but as I reached out to his contacts, it became clear that he had a circle of friends that not only enjoyed his company and respected him, but loved him as well.

Over this past year, we had started to slowly reconnect with each other.  Swapping stories about family and life while fighting the lines at the grocery store.  I so wish I had another shopping trip to go on with him but I'm thankful for the ones we did have.

In the book of Psalms, David writes the "Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.  He makes me to lie down in green pastures; he leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul; he leads me in the paths of righteousness for his name sake."

Then just when it seems that everything is going right for David he continues by saying "Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for you are with me; your rod and staff, they comfort me.  You prepare a table before me in the presense of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup runs over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever."

I think David would've enjoyed a good game of pool like Kipp (Tony) did.  Both of them knew the joys of having a table stacked in their favor and the challenges of when they had their backs against the wall.  Both knew what it was to lead a solitary life but we can all take comfort in David's words when he said "for you are with me".  In the darkest, fearful, most evil places of our lives, God is with us.

None of us really know when the eight ball will finally drop for us.  We can have the best breaks, amazing angles, perfect plans, and easiest shots but we still never know if the shots will actually fall.

At 43, the eight ball unexpectedly fell for another member of my family.  My cousin Kipp.  I want another turn, a do over...something...anything...but that's just not how life goes.  I loved my cousin Kipp and even though it was short, I'm glad we had the time we did over the past year.

Today, I simply ask all that are here in attendance, in rememberance of Kipp...hug your family a little tighter, laugh with your friends a little longer, and linger a bit more in life's precious moments.  We really have no idea when the eight ball will drop for any of us.

I love you Kipp...we all do.  Life definitely didn't give you the best break but you played the table the way you wanted to, what more can we ever ask for in this life.